Hush
by chimingofthebells
Summary: Waiting for a disaster to bring Arthur back, Merlin creates his own.


The air is blurry, stained with smoke and ash, but through all of it Arthur's face stands out like a beacon.

He's so beautiful, Merlin thinks, even as Arthur's face becomes streaked with mud and dried blood, blonde hair plastered to his forehead with sweat and debris. Backlit by the flames of the wreckage around them, framed by a caress of smoke, someone else's blood smeared across his cheek, Arthur is still as beautiful as the day he died.

Merlin's smile breaks into a grin, because finally, finally, Arthur is here, looking like an angel risen from heaven just for him.

Arthur doesn't smile back. Arthur's face is frozen, fixed on Merlin. There's horror in the quirk of his mouth, sadness in the angle of his brow, and disappointment in the set of his eyes. All of it is directed at him.

Merlin frowns. There's a cut along Arthur's temple, oozing with blood. That shouldn't be there, he thinks, Arthur shouldn't be bleeding. He bled to death in his arms a thousand years ago– he should be done with bleeding now. He reaches out to touch the wound, but Arthur flinches back.

"Why, Merlin?" Arthur whispers, his voice cracked from the dry air.

"I had no choice," Merlin says. "I had to bring you back. It was the only way."

Arthur shakes his head in disbelief. "Not this," He says, "You couldn't have done all this."

Merlin's frown deepens. They shouldn't be having this conversation. They should be well past this, to the point of embracing and laughing and putting their old lives behind them. Merlin went to such great lengths to bring Arthur back from the dead, Arthur shouldn't be angry at him.

"I did this all for you," He says.

"Why?" Arthur pleads. "What use is this?"

"The dragon said–" Merlin catches himself. Arthur doesn't know about the dragon yet, but he supposes he can tell him everything later. "The dragon told me that you are the Once and Future King, and that when Albion's need is greatest, you'll rise again."

There's an almighty crash as a building somewhere close collapses, a cloud of debris rising up in its wake.

Arthur says nothing, his horrified countenance begging Merlin to continue.

"I waited a thousand years," Merlin says, taking a step forward. "I waited for so long. But you never came back." He brings up a hand to cup Arthur's jaw. One of them is trembling, but he can't tell which. Maybe both.

"There was a war not too long ago," Merlin murmurs into Arthur's ear, breath hot as he moves against his skin. "I saw it with my own eyes. But you didn't come. Then there was another war that was even greater than that one. Millions died and a thousand more innocents were burned, and I thought surely you would come back then. But you didn't. And ever since then I've watched as the world has crumbled to the verge of ruin, and still you didn't come."

Arthur stands frozen, breathing harsh as sirens scream past them. Beneath Merlin's words, the merry crackle of fire pops and hisses.

"Don't you see?" Merlin whispers, once the sirens have faded. "It was obvious to me. If a disaster didn't happen on its own, I would have to create one myself. It was the only way to bring you back."

Arthur shakes his head in horror. "I'm not worth this."

Merlin chuckles, smoothing his thumb over Arthur's cheekbone. "For a long time, I didn't think so either. But a thousand years can change a man's opinion."

"You went insane," Arthur says in awe, seemingly oblivious to the way Merlin is smoothing his hands over his face, his neck, his shoulders and chest, as though committing every inch to memory again.

Merlin hums, dropping his gaze to Arthur's firm chest, down his arm to where Excalibur rests in Arthur's flaccid grip.

"Maybe," He murmurs, "But it worked, didn't it?"

Arthur winces. "My father told me that magic is only good for evil and destruction. When I found out you had magic, I thought I knew he was wrong."

"Do you still think so?"

Nearby, something pops and sends a burst of embers flying to them, burning on their skin. The smell of roasting flesh hits his nostrils. Merlin flexes his fingers over Arthur's pectoral muscle.

"Magic shouldn't be used like this. I thought you would know better."

"I had to bring you back," Merlin insists, tugging himself closer. Arthur lets himself be pulled, so that Merlin's hands can roam, palming the smooth muscles of his back, kneading his arse, gripping his thighs. "No matter what it took."

His lips ghost over Arthur's throat, and he smiles deliriously at the wild flutter of his pulse. He breathes in deeply, inhaling the intoxicating scent of Arthur's sweat.

"This isn't you," Arthur croaks.

"I don't care," Merlin whispers, winding his finger's in Arthur's hair.

Merlin fits his mouth over Arthur's pulse point and sucks, desperate for proof that Arthur is alive. His sweat is salty on Merlin's tongue, and Merlin laps it up greedily, ravenous for any taste of Arthur that he has been deprived of for so long.

Merlin feels Arthur's arm flex, his grip tightening on the hilt of his sword.

"If the dragon said I would rise when Albion's need is greatest," Arthur says, "Does that mean I'm here to stop destruction?"

Merlin moves his head in a fraction of a nod.

"Does that mean I have to kill you?"

Merlin pauses, detaching his lips to look Arthur in the eyes.

"You can kill me if you want," He says, "I've seen your face. That's all I need."

"I don't want to kill you," Arthur says, and he sounds like he means it.

"Then don't," Merlin replies simply. He brings his hands to Arthur's nape, playing with the soft hairs found there. "Stay with me. I'll put the world back together and we can live as though none of it ever happened." He leans forward to nip lightly at Arthur's earlobe and sucks it between his lips, voice hot as he murmurs. "I'll teach you everything you've missed. We'll be together again."

"What happens when I die again?" Arthur asks. His arms remain stiff at his sides, unresponsive to Merlin's embrace.

"I'll go with you. I won't go mad again."

Arthur exhales shakily. "When I first awoke I heard someone say billions of people have died already," He says. "Because of you. How do I know you aren't mad enough to keep hurting people?"

Merlin leans back to hold Arthur's gaze. "I won't. I have you now, I have no reason to keep doing this."

"Prove it."

Without looking away, Merlin's eyes flash gold. His magic surges, enveloping the entire world. He laughs, a mixture of Arthur's awed expression and the way his magic tickles in his chest making him lightheaded. He can feel his power repairing every part of the world, just as intricately as it had destroyed it. The seams which he had ripped apart are being sewn back together.

He blinks and his power recedes. The smell of burning flesh is gone, the air clear and the fires out.

"See?"

Arthur doesn't move. For a moment, Merlin expects Arthur to kill him anyway, to thrust Excalibur through his chest to completely ensure Albion's safety. Instead he hears the sword clatter to the ground, and a pair of arms wrap around him.

"Okay, Merlin," Arthur says, "Okay."

Merlin melts into Arthur's embrace, arms going slack and all the energy draining out of him. With Arthur back, he suddenly feels the weight of all the years crashing on top of him.

"But Merlin," Arthur whispers, "If you ever do anything like this ever again, I will kill you. I'll have no choice."

"Don't worry," Merlin says, hiding his sudden tears in Arthur's neck. "As long as you don't leave me ever again."

"Alright," Arthur agrees.

Merlin holds him tighter. He waited a thousand years, killed a billion men, all for Arthur. Maybe he has gone mad, maybe the years of solitude turned him insane. But he would do it again, Merlin knows this with as much certainty as he knows Arthur would not hesitate to impale him on his sword. But hopefully it will never come to that.

****For now Merlin just hold him, as the world he destroyed begins to heal.


End file.
